The Old Man’s Premise:
We are always wiser to take our self-help advice from Men & Women of
action. People who have lived much, who burn the wick to the end.
Be they athletes, explorers, adventurers, frontiersmen,
survivors, or “average” men and women in tough spots, their words, their
insights should be weighted far heavier than anything offered from a chair, “brain-cycled”
from an app, “discovered” reclining on a sofa, or hoped for with an affirmation.
That in a nutshell is the entire premise of our just
released book, The
Frontier Stoic: Life Lessons from Those Who Live a Life.
We must never forget, advice offered that was not
lived is false, it is untested.
Much advisory eloquence is simply well-turned prose
that was never lived.
Edifying in the way of a fine poem but just as
ephemeral.
Words from the trenches, acts that provided solace in
real trying circumstances, well, that My Friends, that is something worthy of
mulling and putting into practice.
Which brings us to, Jack Dempsey, a man who needs no
introduction.
In 1944 he was asked by Dale Carnegie if he had a method
for dealing with worry.
He provided the following response.
Side-Note:
We must keep in mind, Jack exaggerates a bit here, mythologizes the Self. We have
plenty of instances where he mentioned being hurt, injured, and like battered
and banged but if we look past the Champ’s exaggeration, the truth of his lesson
holds, the pith of his advice is on point.
To Mr. Dempsey:
“During my career in the ring, I found that Old Man Worry
was an almost tougher opponent than the heavyweight boxers I fought. I realized
that I had to learn to stop worrying, or worry would sap my vitality and
undermine my success. So, little by little, I worked out a system for myself. Here
are some of the things I did:
1. To
keep up my courage in the ring, I would give myself a pep talk during the fight,
for example while I was fighting Firpo for the title, I kept saying over and
over “Nothing is going to stop me. He is not going to hurt me. I won't feel his
blows. I can't get hurt. I am going to keep going no matter what happens.” Making
positive statements like that to myself and thinking positive thoughts helped
me a lot, it even kept my mind so occupied that I didn't feel the blows during
my career I have had my lips smashed my eyes cut my ribs cracked and Firpo
knocked me clean through the ropes, and I landed on the reporter’s typewriter
and wrecked it. But I never felt even one of Firpo’s blows. There was only one
blow that I ever really felt, that was the night Lester Johnson broke three of
my ribs. The punch never hurt me but it affected my breathing. I can honestly say
I never felt any other blow I ever got in the ring.
2. Another
thing I did was keep reminding myself of the futility of worry. Most of my
worrying was done before the big bouts while I was going through training. I
don't often lie awake at nights for hours tossing and worrying, unable to sleep.
I would worry for fear I might break my hand, sprain my ankle and get my eye
cut badly in the first round so I couldn't coordinate my punches. When I got
myself into this state of nerves, I used to get out of bed, look into the
mirror, and give myself a good talking to. I would say to myself: “What a fool
you are to be worrying about something that hasn't happened and may never
happen. Life is short. I have only a few years to live, so I must enjoy life.”
I kept saying to myself, “Nothing is important but my health. Nothing is
important but my health.” I kept reminding myself that losing sleep and
worrying would destroy my health. I found that by saying these things to myself
over and over, night after night, year after year, they finally got under my
skin, and I could brush off my worries like so much water.
3. The
third-- and best --thing I did was pray! While I was training for a bout, I
always prayed several times a day. When I was in the ring, I prayed just before
the bell sounded for each round. That helped me fight with courage and
confidence. I have never gone to bed in my life without saying a prayer; and I
have never eaten a meal of my life without first thanking God for it… Have my
prayers been answered? Thousands of times!”
One may compare this advice to another Champ’s advice—a
bit more grounded but still much the same tactic by viewing Part
1 of this essay.
For those who desire more such advice from the trenches
uttered by go-getters.
Softcover autographed copies of The Frontier Stoic
are available here.
The Kindle version on the cheap here.
PS-If you read the book, and dig what you find there,
a review on the Amazon site is a mighty big help. Obliged!
Resources for Livin’ the Warrior Life
https://www.extremeselfprotection.com/
The Indigenous Ability Blog
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